Reality Check

We just had a really good friend post a comment regarding our ridiculous attitude to things like the Hermes products and the ridiculous plane rides. O.k... we understand that we have some explaining to do, especially to those of you that don't know us.

When we say things like "these non-Hermes products are burning our skin," we're not actually serious (OK, well maybe a bit... maximum 10%... but seriously, the products in that bathroom felt like the homemade soap that my grandma used to make. I don't think grams had a name for it but 'Lemon Lye' would have been good) and truth be told, the plane rides were kind of fun save the passengers that were not inclined to wear deodorant. After pouring over the last few posts, I realized I need to clear a few things up. Things are sounding rather snooty. Yes, we have a nice place and we love where we live. We acknowledge that we are (as 'moms the word' would say) lucky, lucky boys... however... you need to know that Hermes products do not exist in our home. In fact, there is currently a bottle of Herbal Essences in our shower. Our walls are bare, save artwork given to us (or sold to us at cost) by our amazingly talented friends. When my friends and I get together to throw down a few drinks, we usually opt for Sola. A refreshing, crispy (read: varnish) white wine that does not signify the actual grape they are using. To be honest, I wouldn't be surprised if it was a powder mixed with water. So, for those of you that have been rolling your eyes, take it with a grain of salt.

What brought all of this up? We overheard two English families talking last night while we were waiting to be seated for dinner. The mothers were talking about their ski instructor in the Alps. The conversation went something like this:
Mumsie #1: Did you have the same instructor as I?
Mumsie #2: I did. He's very well bred you know.
Musmie #1: Indeed. He went to Eton you know.

Well bred? People actually say things like that? Was their instructor a really well trained horse? For crying out loud! We continued to watch them and one of the fathers nearly blew a gasket when he realized that one of his children would have to sit with their legs on either side of a table leg. Oh the humanity! It was seriously gross. Anyway, all of this to say that if you had previously lumped us into the same category as the 'Mumsies,' please reconsider.

Also... I'm going to stick up for my boy right now. Drilling inside someone's mouth all day is not an easy task. Imagine having to stick your nose into a post-caesar salad cavity only to find a gingivitis surprise! Granted, he plays hard but he works even harder (I would say that I do the same except that I'm not going to see a decent paycheck until this MA is complete in June). In fact, this is probably a good time to tell you that there is another man in our relationship. His name is Frank Spears. He runs dental conferences and makes DVD tutorials for dentists. Ryan has been to a million of these conferences and purchases the DVDs every time he goes. Guess when he plays them? Ya... nothing like waking up on Saturday morning looking for a little nookie only to realize that Ryan is already mesmerized by Frank preparing teeth for exquisite porcelain veneers. Hot, don't you think? Seriously, at this rate the only way I can compare with Frank is if I can somehow come up with an eau de toilette that smells like cheeseburgers and french fries with a side of mayo that I can spritz on myself.

Now that that's all over... check out where we're staying NOW!! Well, maybe not. We'll just tell you that it's the hotel that Madonna stayed at the entire time she was filming Evita (Those of you that don't know Ryan... I had to add that. You know the Salsa Golf inventor? He's the pope of Ryan's religion. Madonna is God. Celine... I don't know, baby Jesus?).